humiliation

Sometimes life can be very humiliating. Especially as a parent.

My daughter was two and a half. My sister was visiting from Texas. What else do you do on a Spring Break vacation but go to the beach?

We lived in Orlando at the time. I packed the trunkload of necessities, my daughter, sister and a friend to go to the New Smyrna Beach on Good Friday. As you may know, you actually park your car on the beach. The beach is really more of an expressway, with loungers lined up on the water. Not exactly a refreshing experience, sitting and breathing in exhaust fumes and being bombarded by too loud music from too cheap sound systems on too old cars driven by too young guys with even more too young girls hanging all over them.

Finding a place to park that time of year is like finding a spot to park at the Mall two days before Christmas.

"Ah, there's one!" We wheeled in, unloaded our chairs, sunscreen and water bottles. It was going to be a lovely afternoon. We had just settled in and were beginning to relax from the drive. . .

"Mommy. . . potty. . . Mommy. . ."

No, it couldn't be, I would lose our spot and have to start all over. "Baby, do you just have to pee? You can just wade into the water and sit."

(I know, that is so gross, but I was a young mother, so spare me the lectures!!)

Well, she waded in a tad and sat down. Relieved, I went back to my chair, just a foot away from her.

The next thing, OMG, I could not believe my eyes. How did a tiny child produce a log this huge???? What do you do with a floating turd? What was worse is that as the ocean water came in and then back out, it rolled to shore, then rolled out.

Back and forth it rolled. I stood, hypnotised by the rolling tide, I mean turd.

People were walking by, clearly repulsed at the sight. Next thing I knew, here comes another one! I wanted to find a shovel, not to bury the evidence, but to quickly dig my own grave as I was dying from mortification. But I did not have one, so how DID I get rid of the two huge tootsies?

You know, I don't remember what I did about them. I do know somehow they went away. My baby was real happy. . . My sister and friend laughed for days and weeks and years over the incident.

So as the saying goes, sh_t happens! You just have to roll with it!